Have you ever felt stuck in your professional life? I have and it made me anxious but I have learned to use it as an opportunity to reassess my current choices. People often feel stuck when their lives lack movement, meaning, or autonomy. I recently started a job in a large, dysfunctional organization that felt like a mess the moment I walked in. When I asked people why they were still there, many responded with some version of, “I got stuck here a long time ago.”

I spoke with employees who had been there for decades. Their responses pretty much echoed the same theme: “I just do what I’ve always done and go home.” That hit me hard. I’m someone who’s restless to a fault.

The moment I start to feel stagnant or bored, I crave change. I’m terrified of missing life. My daughter calls it FOMO (fear of missing out), and she’s not wrong. So working with people who’ve felt stuck for years has been a real challenge for me.

I get that many people value familiarity and certainty because it provides psychological safety. But for me, staying stuck feels constraining and miserable. I’ve made major career changes, taken pay cuts, and pushed myself through steep learning curves so that I could grow. I believe when we stop exposing ourselves to new ideas and experiences, we lose clarity, perspective, and eventually, our sense of autonomy.

These differences in preferences between stability and change got me thinking: how do we choose to live our lives? What tradeoffs are we making, consciously or unconsciously?

Maybe you’ve been there too—wondering if the stability you’ve chosen is actually holding you back.

Below is a list of questions I’ve used to explore that for myself. I’m sharing them with you to help you reflect on your own preferences—and I’ll include my answers to each to keep it interesting.

Self-Reflection Questions:

1. Do you feel more comfortable with routine and predictability, or do you thrive on change and new experiences?
   Me: I thrive on change even when it’s uncomfortable but it has cost me money and it can be stressful when I had to adapt to learn a new job in a new industry.
2. When faced with a decision, do you prioritize security and certainty, or do you seek opportunities for growth and exploration?
   Me: I choose growth, even if it’s risky. In the past, these choices have usually improved my finances. My latest change is still underway; I might have erred this time, but I’ve learned a lot about myself.
3. Do you find satisfaction in having a steady income and a clear career path, or do you crave the freedom to pursue different interests and passions?
   Me: I’ve taken big financial hits to explore new passions. I do think it has made my life interesting but there are downsides too. There are times when I get frustrated with myself and ask, why can’t I just take it easy. That is something I will continue to explore.
4. How do you react to the idea of taking risks, such as starting a new job or moving to a new city?
   Me: I feel excited. It opens up opportunities to learn and meet different people. I continue to develop strong people and communication skills through these experiences. I have very diverse experiences throughout my life.
5. Do you value having control over your choices and actions, or do you prefer clear guidelines and expectations to follow?
   Me: I still crave more autonomy in life. I would like to earn money independently, without a job, boss or organizational culture that I have to try to fit into. I would prefer to never have a job again and figure out how to make a living on my own.
6. How important is financial independence to you in achieving personal autonomy?
   Me: I want to become even more financially independent because it will give me the freedom to make choices in life without feeling stuck. I want more personal agency and am learning new ways to get it everyday.

We all make tradeoffs between safety and freedom, stability and growth. The goal isn’t to change your nature, but to become more aware of what drives you—and to make sure that your lifestyle choices are aligned with your values.

By discovering what truly matters to you, you can create a harmonious balance that energizes your life. Even for those who may resist change, it’s entirely possible to escape the feeling of being stuck and embrace a more vibrant and fulfilling life without needing to change jobs. Often, it starts with a positive mindset shift and reflecting on how and why you approach your work, all while remaining in your current position. By actively pursuing opportunities where you can influence outcomes and take control of various aspects of your life, you can uncover a deeper sense of joy and fulfillment.

Hopefully, this blog is helpful to determine which side do you lean toward—and what does that tell you about what you want next?